WAIT, I know it's long but don't run away yet. :) It would really be encouraging to know you read this and to get your feedback. This is a study I did for myself because of things that have been on my mind over the years and I made it into a sermon outline for Ryan. Warning, various soap boxes scattered throughout. I hope no one takes offense to me sharing this as though I am teaching over anyone. I just sincerely wanted to share these thoughts.
We are to…
1) Edify, not be a cause to stumble
Edify through foregoing liberties
Rom 14:21
It is good neither to eat meat nor drink wine nor do anything by which your brother stumbles or is offended or is made weak.
Edify through patience and care
1 Thess 5:11, 14
Therefore comfort each other and edify one another, just as you also are doing.
Now we exhort you, brethren, warn those who are unruly, comfort the fainthearted, uphold the weak, be patient with all.
Edify through song
Col 3:16
Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly in all wisdom, teaching and admonishing one another in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing with grace in your hearts to the Lord
Edify through fellowship
How can we edify our brethren if we are never around them? Do we regularly make a choice to not be together with brethren when there are plenty of opportunities (both inside and outside the worship assembly). Are you making yourself available for edification? Give people a chance to get to know you and be your friend! Otherwise, some may find friends in the wrong places.
Heb 10:25
Not forsaking the assembling of ourselves together, as is the manner of some, but exhorting one another, and so much the more as you see the Day approaching.
1 Cor 15:33
Do not be deceived:"Evil company corrupts good habits.
Edify through example/teaching
Titus 2:4-10
That [the older women] admonish the young women to love their husbands, to love their children, 5 to be discreet, chaste, homemakers, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God may not be blasphemed.
6 Likewise, exhort the young men to be sober-minded, 7 in all things showing yourself to be a pattern of good works; in doctrine showing integrity, reverence, incorruptibility, 8 sound speech that cannot be condemned, that one who is an opponent may be ashamed, having nothing evil to say of you.
9 Exhort bondservants to be obedient to their own masters, to be well pleasing in all things, not answering back, 10 not pilfering, but showing all good fidelity, that they may adorn the doctrine of God our Savior in all things.
NOT…
Discourage or be cause to stumble
Matt 18:6-7
Whoever causes one of these little ones who believe in Me to sin, it would be better for him if a millstone were hung around his neck, and he were drowned in the depth of the sea. 7 Woe to the world because of offenses! For offenses must come, but woe to that man by whom the offense comes!
2) Care, not be partial
Care through physical aid
Acts 4:32-34
Now the multitude of those who believed were of one heart and one soul; neither did anyone say that any of the things he possessed was his own, but they had all things in common. 33 And with great power the apostles gave witness to the resurrection of the Lord Jesus. And great grace was upon them all. 34 Nor was there anyone among them who lacked; for all who were possessors of lands or houses sold them, and brought the proceeds of the things that were sold
1 John 3:16-18
By this we know love, because He laid down His life for us. And we also ought to lay down our lives for the brethren. 17 But whoever has this world's goods, and sees his brother in need, and shuts up his heart from him, how does the love of God abide in him? 18 My little children, let us not love in word or in tongue, but in deed and in truth.
Care through emotional support
1 Cor 12:26
And if one member suffers, all the members suffer with it; or if one member is honored, all the members rejoice with it.
Care through unselfishness
Phil 2:3-4
Let nothing be done through selfish ambition or conceit, but in lowliness of mind let each esteem others better than himself. 4 Let each of you look out not only for his own interests, but also for the interests of others.
NOT…
To be exclusive
We’ve all seen brethren that become exclusive to a certain group of other Christians to the point that others are left out and unattended to. It’s fine to enjoy being with certain people, but are we showing EVERYONE that we care? Do we still find ample time to be with and show our care for those other than our normal, exclusive circle of friends? Think about it! Someone may need our friendship out there!
1 Cor 12:26
That there should be no schism in the body, but that the members should have the same care for one another.
James 2:1-9
My brethren, do not hold the faith of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Lord of glory, with partiality. 2 For if there should come into your assembly a man with gold rings, in fine apparel, and there should also come in a poor man in filthy clothes, 3 and you pay attention to the one wearing the fine clothes and say to him, "You sit here in a good place," and say to the poor man, "You stand there," or, "Sit here at my footstool," 4 have you not shown partiality among yourselves, and become judges with evil thoughts?
5 Listen, my beloved brethren: Has God not chosen the poor of this world to be rich in faith and heirs of the kingdom which He promised to those who love Him? 6 But you have dishonored the poor man. Do not the rich oppress you and drag you into the courts? 7 Do they not blaspheme that noble name by which you are called?
8 If you really fulfill the royal law according to the Scripture, "You shall love your neighbor as yourself," you do well; 9 but if you show partiality, you commit sin, and are convicted by the law as transgressors.
3) Work, not be a burden
Work that you may give
Eph 4:28
Let him who stole steal no longer, but rather let him labor, working with his hands what is good, that he may have something to give him who has need.
Work that you may fruitful
Titus 3:8, 14
This is a faithful saying, and these things I want you to affirm constantly, that those who have believed in God should be careful to maintain good works. These things are good and profitable to men.
And let our people also learn to maintain good works, to meet urgent needs, that they may not be unfruitful.
Gal 6:10
Therefore, as we have opportunity, let us do good to all, especially to those who are of the household of faith.
NOT…
To be a hindrance
Are you getting to work or are you stuck on getting your way or pushing an agenda? Diotrephes wanted to run the church his way and it became a hindrance to Paul’s preaching.
3 John 9-12
I wrote to the church, but Diotrephes, who loves to have the preeminence among them, does not receive us. 10 Therefore, if I come, I will call to mind his deeds which he does, prating against us with malicious words. And not content with that, he himself does not receive the brethren, and forbids those who wish to, putting them out of the church.
11 Beloved, do not imitate what is evil, but what is good. He who does good is of God, but he who does evil has not seen God.
12 Demetrius has a good testimony from all, and from the truth itself. And we also bear witness, and you know that our testimony is true.
Are we getting to work or are we busy finding out the latest “he said, she said” and “he did this, she did that”? We must keep our attitudes in check; are we minding our own business?
2 Thess 3:11
For we hear that there are some who walk among you in a disorderly manner, not working at all, but are busybodies.
1 Thess 2:9
For you remember, brethren, our labor and toil; for laboring night and day, that we might not be a burden to any of you, we preached to you the gospel of God.
4) Restore, not judge
Restore through gentleness
Gal 6:1
Brethren, if a man is overtaken in any trespass, you who are spiritual restore such a one in a spirit of gentleness, considering yourself lest you also be tempted.
Restore through forgiveness
Do we still hold a sin to someone’s charge who has repented of it? We all sin, who are we to judge? It’s time to get past the past and get on with our lives.
Eph 4:32
And be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God in Christ forgave you.
NOT...
To judge unrighteously
Matt 7:1-5
Judge not, that you be not judged. 2 For with what judgment you judge, you will be judged; and with the measure you use, it will be measured back to you. 3 And why do you look at the speck in your brother's eye, but do not consider the plank in your own eye? 4 Or how can you say to your brother, 'Let me remove the speck from your eye'; and look, a plank is in your own eye? 5 Hypocrite! First remove the plank from your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother's eye.
5) Discipline, not be apathetic
Discipline when initial efforts fail
We must follow through all the steps in the right order!
Matt 18:15-17
Moreover if your brother sins against you, go and tell him his fault between you and him alone. If he hears you, you have gained your brother. 16 But if he will not hear, take with you one or two more, that 'by the mouth of two or three witnesses every word may be established.' 17 And if he refuses to hear them, tell it to the church. But if he refuses even to hear the church, let him be to you like a heathen and a tax collector.
Discipline to aid restoration
NOT…
Overlook those falling away
Is there sin among our members that goes overlooked? What good is that to anyone? There is a soul on the line and apathy shows that soul that he/she does not need to make a change. That has potential to affect the entire congregation!
1 Cor 5:2-7
And you are puffed up, and have not rather mourned, that he who has done this deed might be taken away from among you. 3 For I indeed, as absent in body but present in spirit, have already judged (as though I were present) him who has so done this deed. 4 In the name of our Lord Jesus Christ, when you are gathered together, along with my spirit, with the power of our Lord Jesus Christ, 5 deliver such a one to Satan for the destruction of the flesh, that his spirit may be saved in the day of the Lord Jesus.
6 Your glorying is not good. Do you not know that a little leaven leavens the whole lump? 7 Therefore purge out the old leaven, that you may be a new lump, since you truly are unleavened. For indeed Christ, our Passover, was sacrificed for us.
6) Unite, not divide
Unite through reconciliation
Ill feelings between you and another brother or sister? Have you settled it or let it fester? Learn to say when you’re offended (or how in the world do they know), learn to say your sorry, forget the pride, and let’s all be friends! We have better things to be doing.
Matt 5:22-24
But I say to you that whoever is angry with his brother without a cause shall be in danger of the judgment. And whoever says to his brother,'Raca!' shall be in danger of the council. But whoever says,'You fool!' shall be in danger of hell fire. 23 Therefore if you bring your gift to the altar, and there remember that your brother has something against you, 24 leave your gift there before the altar, and go your way. First be reconciled to your brother, and then come and offer your gift.
Unite in work and growth
Eph 4:16
From whom the whole body, joined and knit together by what every joint supplies, according to the effective working by which every part does its share, causes growth of the body for the edifying of itself in love.
1 Cor 1:10-11
Now I plead with you, brethren, by the name of our Lord Jesus Christ, that you all speak the same thing, and that there be no divisions among you, but that you be perfectly joined together in the same mind and in the same judgment.
Unite that we be examples
John 17:20-22
"I do not pray for these alone, but also for those who will believe in Me through their word; 21 that they all may be one, as You, Father, are in Me, and I in You; that they also may be one in Us, that the world may believe that You sent Me.
NOT…
To bicker among brethren
Do we preach unity but act differently. It is right to fight for the issues of right and wrong, but what is our attitude behind it. Don’t just argue for the sake of arguing. Fighting the good fight is for benefit, not to hinder the gospel. Those outside the church will see our problems within. We should not waste our time in vain arguments! Pick your battles.
1 Tim 6:20-21
O Timothy! Guard what was committed to your trust, avoiding the profane and idle babblings and contradictions of what is falsely called knowledge — 21 by professing it some have strayed concerning the faith.
Rom 2:21-23
You, therefore, who teach another, do you not teach yourself? You who preach that a man should not steal, do you steal? 22 You who say, "Do not commit adultery," do you commit adultery? You who abhor idols, do you rob temples? 23 You who make your boast in the law, do you dishonor God through breaking the law?
Gal 5:14-15
For all the law is fulfilled in one word, even in this: "You shall love your neighbor as yourself." 15 But if you bite and devour one another, beware lest you be consumed by one another!
So, are we REALLY meeting the needs of our brethren? Things to think about.
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